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How To Get To Know A Disabled Person
When you first meet someone who is blind, deaf, or in a wheelchair, what is your initial reaction? Curiosity? Sympathy? Awkwardness? If you experience any of these emotions, you are not alone. Chances are you don't regularly associate with someone who is disabled, so these feelings are quite common. Having been blind since birth, I have encountered a wide range of reactions, from curious stares when i walk down the street with a cane or holding someone's arm, to amazement at being able to feed and dress myself. Most people don't intend to be rude or insensitive, but just aren't sure what to expect. Here are four points to keep in mind if you should happen to meet a disabled person. 1. Disabled people can lead active lives. With few exceptions, a disability does not prevent someone from working, raising a family, or taking part in social activities. Many sports and recreation programs have been adapted to accommodate a person with a disability, including baseball, golf, water skiing, biking, and swimming. Instead of concentrating on the disability, look at the person the same way you would any other acquaintance. 2. It's all right to ask questions. Many people are afraid of offending someone by asking about their disability. When meeting anyone for the first time, it's natural to be curious about who they are, where they're from, and what they do for a living. The same is true for a disabled person. Asking questions is usually acceptable, as long as you use common sense. Don't, for example, ask a blind person how he feeds and bathes himself. Instead, find out what equipment or techniques he uses in his job and at home, how he gets around town, how does Braille work, etc. 3. Offer assistance when necessary. You see a woman in a wheelchair having trouble entering a building or negotiating steps. You'd like to help, but don't want to embarrass her. What should you do? It's usually appropriate to lend a hand if someone is having obvious difficulty, but keep in mind that not everyone will be willing to accept your help. It's not much different than pulling over and offering assistance to a motorist with a flat tire. Unless the woman in the wheelchair is in danger, it isn't necessary to press the issue if they refuse your help. You did your part. 4. Remember that we all have obstacles to overcome. No matter who we are, each of us has a weakness or challenge to face. How do you feel when you are treated differently for being bald, short, or heavyset? Like you, a disabled person would much rather be accepted for who they are, rather than be pitied or shunned because of a disability. Many friends and colleagues have said to me, "I often forget that you are blind." To me, that is the ultimate compliment. Meeting someone with a disability doesn't have to be an intimidating experience. Asking questions, offering assistance, and putting yourself in their shoes can go a long way toward recognizing them as people with normal thoughts and feelings who just happen to have a disability. Who knows? You might make some new friends in the process. About The Author Stephen Michael Kerr is a blind radio broadcaster and freelance writer. He has launched a free e-mail newsletter on sports and recreation for people with disabilities. For more information about disabilities or the newsletter, e-mail Stephen at:
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Coaching Steps to Becoming a Good Leader STEPS TO BECOMING A GOOD LEADER: 1. Develop a master plan. What are your goals? What are the organization's goals? How are you going to reach them? 2. Develop a leadership style. To manage people, you need to know how you are going to do it. Be comfortable with the leadership style you choose, and it will lead to future success. 3. Know the risks. Making any decision has its risks. Know the risks involved and whether the organization can afford to take them. 4. Get the authority you need. You need authority to achieve goals. If you don't have enough, get assertive. Tell your superiors you need more authority to make decisions. 5. Be decisive. Don't get caught saying, "Let me get back to you." Consult staff, but you make the decisions. 6. Be firm. If you believe in your decisions, then stick to them. However, be open to suggestions and be flexible. What We Can Learn From J. Paul Getty J. Paul Getty planned to enter the U.S. Diplomatic Service, but, when he got out of college, the Oklahoma oil boom caught his attention. Since his father had already prospered in the oil business, he was irresistibly attracted to the prospects of wildcatting, and he decided to postpone his diplomatic ambitions for two more years. Managing Monsters in Meetings - Part 2, Multiple Conversations Side conversations ruin meetings by destroying focus and fragmenting participation. Three Growth Guidelines from Stephen Covey I have been looking for answers to what it takes to create a winning corporate culture in the midst of today's confusing economic indicators. If I rely solely on history or economic indicators, I won't find the answers. Company profits are up, yet job growth is sputtering. Communication happens at breakneck speed, yet we often feel less connected to our peers than we ever did. Managing Monsters in Meetings - Part 3, Drifting From the Topic Although new ideas lead to creative solutions, they can be a challenge when they interrupt or distract the work on an issue. The Tao of Leadership There can be no doubt that the ancient author of the Tao Te Ching, Lao-Tzu, was a man of unique wisdom whose writings continue to influence people of different backgrounds and faiths. Are You a Leader or a Manager? President Ike Eisenhower once demonstrated the difference between leadership and management to his cabinet by putting a piece of string in a straight line on the conference table. He then asked one of the attendees to put his finger on one end of the string and push it. The string, of course, bunched up in an ugly bundle. He then asked the man to pull the string with his finger on one end. The string straightened up in a nice neat line and followed the finger across the table. "This", said Ike "is the difference between managing and leading." Leadership and Power - Being the Boss Doesnt Guarantee Either of Them Some people mistakenly associate supervisory positions, or seats of power, with leadership. They presume that these two things are synonymous. While this may be the case sometimes, leadership and power are wholly separate. In reality, the boss may not have all of the power, and in fact, may not be capable of handling it, even if he did possess all of it. What do I mean? What is leadership, and what is power? How do they inter-relate? How are power and leadership obtained? Let's take a look. Seven Personal Characteristics Of A Good Leader How often have you heard the comment, "He or she is a born leader?" There are certain characteristics found in some people that seem to naturally put them in a position where they're looked up to as a leader. Leadership Tips From My Dad Lee (L.B.) Weiss (Sept. 21/25 April 30/82) Mentors and Coaches: How to Be A Great Mentor Though out your career you may be asked to become someone's mentor. Mentoring is a rewarding activity for both you and the mentee it is a great way to give back while sharing your experiences and wisdom. And it's very flattering to be asked and can appeal to our ego. Too often people agree, feeling very honoured by the request, before giving the role much thought. There is a significant investment of time and effort required to be a good mentor. If you do agree to become someone's mentor you must realize that you have the ability to make a dramatic positive or negative impact on that person'these guidelines will help to ensure you fulfill your role well. Lead People...Manage Things Master The Five Key Facets of High Performance Leadership Abe Lincoln: An Extraordinary Leader Perhaps noted as one of the greatest United States presidents of all time, Abraham Lincoln's early life may not have reflected his potential greatness. He failed in business. He lost election to the state legislature, Speaker of the House, nomination for Congress, appointment of land officer, U.S. Senate twice and nomination for Vice President. After those eight major failures, Lincoln was elected President of the United States. How many of us would have kept going like Lincoln did? Follow My Leader - To Effect Change, Leaders Must Walk the Talk! A leader's role Evil, Hostile Grumpy Listeners? Think Again I hated Kyle Sisk*. A notorious bully, Kyle punctuated my grade school years with misery. He would tease me about my weight, purposely rattle me with shocking language, delight in making me look foolish at every opportunity. Kyle had scary, penetrating eyes and sharp, jagged teeth that looked, appropriately, like fangs. He even had his own evil henchman named Eddie who would follow him everywhere, laughing a conspiratorial little laugh asking, "Heh, heh, what are we going to do next, Kyle? Heh, heh." (All Eddie was missing was a hump.) A typical encounter was the time I was walking home from school and Kyle and Eddie pounced from behind some bushes, grabbed my books and threw them in the mud. Even worse, they snatched my precious, brand new little purse and threw it into the branches of a tree, far out of reach. They then ran off cackling in triumph. I, purseless, limped home in tears. Leadership - Connect to Engage! It's been said many times that true leadership is measured by ones ability to motivate and influence others. Effective Listening Equals Effective Leadership: Learn How! No matter what role you play in your company, becoming a more effective listener will help you get ahead in your position. It means fewer errors, improved accuracy, and enhanced working relationships. And, listening to your customers and referral sources will definitely help you in your marketing efforts. You will solicit better information from other people whether interviewing job candidates, solving work problems, or working to make a sale. Quality Leadership The Lakota tribe of Native Americans has no word in the language for "I" or "me," only "we" or "us." Mahatma Gandhi insisted on traveling in third class carriages (on the train)because, as he explained, 'there is no fourth class.' " The Three Faces of Leadership This article was published in the Nov. 2003 edition of Hamilton, Ontario's BIZ Magazine under the title "Leadership's Triple Crown" LM The Leadership Strategy: An Unmined Comstock Lode of Results During the Second World War, Winston Churchill had a framed inscription on his desk that said, "It's not enough to say we are doing our best. We must succeed in doing what is necessary."
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