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Narcissism, Substance Abuse, and Reckless Behaviours
Pathological narcissism is an addiction to Narcissistic Supply, the narcissist's drug of choice. It is, therefore, not surprising that other addictive and reckless behaviours workaholism, alcoholism, drug abuse, pathological gambling, compulsory shopping, or reckless driving piggyback on this primary dependence. The narcissist like other types of addicts derives pleasure from these exploits. But they also sustain and enhance his grandiose fantasies as "unique", "superior", "entitled", and "chosen". They place him above the laws and pressures of the mundane and away from the humiliating and sobering demands of reality. They render him the centre of attention but also place him in "splendid isolation" from the madding and inferior crowd. Such compulsory and wild pursuits provide a psychological exoskeleton. They are a substitute to quotidian existence. They afford the narcissist with an agenda, with timetables, goals, and faux achievements. The narcissist the adrenaline junkie feels that he is in control, alert, excited, and vital. He does not regard his condition as dependence. The narcissist firmly believes that he is in charge of his addiction, that he can quit at will and on short notice. The narcissist denies his cravings for fear of "losing face" and subverting the flawless, perfect, immaculate, and omnipotent image he projects. When caught red handed, the narcissist underestimates, rationalises, or intellectualises his addictive and reckless behaviours converting them into an integral part of his grandiose and fantastic False Self. Thus, a drug abusing narcissist may claim to be conducting first hand research for the benefit of humanity or that his substance abuse results in enhanced creativity and productivity. The dependence of some narcissists becomes a way of life: busy corporate executives, race car drivers, or professional gamblers come to mind. The narcissist's addictive behaviours take his mind off his inherent limitations, inevitable failures, painful and much-feared rejections, and the Grandiosity Gap the abyss between the image he projects (the False Self) and the injurious truth. They relieve his anxiety and resolve the tension between his unrealistic expectations and inflated self-image and his incommensurate achievements, position, status, recognition, intelligence, wealth, and physique. Thus, there is no point in treating the dependence and recklessness of the narcissist without first treating the underlying personality disorder. The narcissist's addictions serve deeply ingrained emotional needs. They intermesh seamlessly with the pathological structure of his disorganised personality, with his character faults, and primitive defence mechanisms. Techniques such as "12 steps" may prove more efficacious in treating the narcissist's grandiosity, rigidity, sense of entitlement, exploitativeness, and lack of empathy. This is because as opposed to traditional treatment modalities the emphasis is on tackling the narcissist's psychological makeup, rather than on behaviour modification. The narcissist's overwhelming need to feel omnipotent and superior can be co-opted in the therapeutic process. Overcoming an addictive behaviour can be truthfully presented by the therapist as a rare and impressive feat, worthy of the narcissist's unique mettle. Narcissists fall for these transparent pitches surprisingly often. But this approach can backfire. Should the narcissist relapse an almost certain occurrence he will feel ashamed to admit his fallibility, need for emotional sustenance, and impotence. He is likely to avoid treatment altogether and convince himself that now, having succeeded once to get rid of his addiction, he is self-sufficient and omniscient. First published in my
About The Author Sam Vaknin is the author of Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited and After the Rain - How the West Lost the East. He is a columnist for Central Europe Review, PopMatters, and eBookWeb , a United Press International (UPI) Senior Business Correspondent, and the editor of mental health and Central East Europe categories in The Open Directory Bellaonline, and Suite101 . Until recently, he served as the Economic Advisor to the Government of Macedonia. Visit Sam's Web site at http://samvak.tripod.com; palma@unet.com.mk
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Alternative Medicine Do You Love Your Body? Through out the course of one's life one is faced with and accumulates a history of emotional trauma that becomes stored in ones's energy field. Such trauma poses many problems. These include such things as emotional and physical pain, chronic stress, a drain in one's vital life energy and the tendency for the individual to take flight from the physical body. In this article I hope to address the latter, its consequences and a new modality that may be able to reverse this tendency. Four Cognitive Skills for Successful Learning The word "cognition" is defined as "the act of knowing" or "knowledge." Cognitive skills therefore refer to those skills that make it possible for us to know. The Undeniable Power of Suggestion How exactly is the Human Psyche effected by the trivial "power of suggestion?" When a thought or seed is planted into the human mind, the psyche responsively triggers a lingering product of that thought. For example, urban legends have been circulated throughout history; in doing so, a mindset is incorporated into the psyche, creating a deceitful illusion that cannot distinguish fact from fiction. Why Other Children are Rejecting Your Child Introduction Subconscious Drives Make You Unhappy Feelings and emotions are nerve impulses. The 5 Hindrances of the Mind: Are They Blocking Your Self-Esteem? The issue of self-esteem is perhaps one of the greatest determinates in creating a life of freedom and abundance, or feeling inhibited and "just getting by". Self-esteem is defined as "a feeling of pride in oneself". It is how you feel in relation to yourself rather than how others see you. It's between you and, well? you. Therefore, it's not necessary to be so concerned about what others think to determine your level of self -esteem, as the definition does not include any "others", just you. So where can you help yourself to better understand you? There are so many aspects of you but one that is of great importance is that of your mind. What is the Theory of Multiple Intelligences? Part 1: Biological Basis Howard Gardner's theory of multiple intelligences is based on the premise that each individual's intelligence is composed of multiple "intelligences," each of which has its own independent operating system within the brain. These intelligences include: verbal-linguistic, logical-mathematical, spatial, bodily-kinesthetic, musical, interpersonal, intrapersonal, and naturalist. Eating Disorders and the Narcissist Patients suffering from eating disorders binge on food and sometimes are both anorectic and bulimic. This is an impulsive behaviour as defined by the DSM (particularly in the case of BPD and to a lesser extent of Cluster B disorders in general). Some patients develop these disorders as a way to self-mutilate. It is a convergence of two pathological behaviours: self-mutilation and an impulsive (rather, compulsive or ritualistic) behaviour. Anti-Social Behaviors and Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder Anti-social behaviors are common with ADHD individuals. About 60% of Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder kids are also oppositional or defiant. Some are even getting in trouble with the law. Kids and Lifebooks: Tips for Social Workers Every child who is adopted from foster care deserves a clear, detailed record of his or her life prior to adoption. While a foster child is waiting for a forever family, a lifebook can help her to make sense of the past and prepare to go forward. I?m Sorry! Blame-Game or Accountability? A powerful tool for health as we approach the new year can be to focus on giving and/or receiving only real apologies when we want to heal a rift with a family member, friend, or co-worker. We hear apologies all the time, but I don't think many of them are sincere. An apology has to be real to heal. Emotional Intelligence: The Basics There's so much talk about emotional intelligence and how it can promote personal and business success. What is it really? What are its basic tenets? Are Observations Objective? On the outset all observations may seem to be objective, but in reality subjectivity tends to shape the objective observations. The observations can be categorized into three for better understanding Objective, Subjective, medley of subjective/objective observations. Treatment Modalities and Therapies Narcissism constitutes the entire personality. It is all-pervasive. Being a narcissist is akin to being an alcoholic but much more so. Alcoholism is an impulsive behaviour. Narcissists exhibit dozens of similarly reckless behaviours, some of them uncontrollable (like their rage, the outcome of their wounded grandiosity). Narcissism is not a vocation. Narcissism resembles depression or other disorders and cannot be changed at will. Waking Up in the Middle of a Good Dream When the brain is asleep and in REM dream mode it has distinct patterns not found in normal waking states. When people who are dreaming are hooked up to machines the REM mode of sleep is quite evident. Have you ever woke up in the middle of a really good dream? Then sometimes you can fall back asleep and go right to where you left off and other times you just can't? This is a real problem for humans. I have an idea to help fix this problem. Gender and the Narcissist In the manifestation of their narcissism, female and male narcissists, inevitably, do tend to differ. They emphasise different things. They transform different elements of their personality and of their life into the cornerstones of their disorder. The Joan of Arc Complex Sometimes I think that I have a mental health problem and that at any minute the pharmaceutical companies are going to develop a cute little green star-shaped pill to cure me of my ailment. I call it my Joan of Arc Complex. You see, I hear voices that I'm pretty sure aren't mine and they tell me to go out and do these stupid save the world projects. I call them THEY or THEM because they refuse to give me a more accurate name to call them. So, I must be crazy. The Attention Spanner After a long and patient wait in queue, you reached the post office counter. Just then, the peasant sauntered over and plunked himself in front of you. Your reaction was natural. Paul Ekman, the world famous emotions scientist, dedicated his career to the study of emotional reactions. "We become aware a quarter, or half second after the emotion begins. I do not choose .... to become angry. I am suddenly angry. I can usually figure out later what someone did that caused the emotion." The transit of that compelling emotion was insidious. If only you could manage its impact! The Myth of Mental Illness "You can know the name of a bird in all the languages of the world, but when you are finished, you'll know absolutely nothing whatever about the bird? So let's look at the bird and see what it's doing that's what counts. I learned very early the difference between knowing the name of something and knowing something." The Psychology of Torture There is one place in which one's privacy, intimacy, integrity and inviolability are guaranteed - one's body, a unique temple and a familiar territory of sensa and personal history. The torturer invades, defiles and desecrates this shrine. He does so publicly, deliberately, repeatedly and, often, sadistically and sexually, with undisguised pleasure. Hence the all-pervasive, long-lasting, and, frequently, irreversible effects and outcomes of torture.
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